Will just add a little bit Merc, I was very lucky as a drinker, I was known as a "happy" drinker, I drunk because after being in a welding helmet all day, especially in summer, earlier on in negative ventilation sweatshops around Sydney, well the first thing I wanted was an ice cold bitter beer, not draught, but something bitter to wash all that metal dust out of my throat, i/we convinced ourselves we "deserved" it, as a right, just like your right to morning smoko!
That was the early 70's, after that until 1979 in Qld, I worked away and we were put up in pubs, geez 6am to 5pm, hour for lunch, at the pub as it was paid for, 10 pots, or middies each day, knock off same, dinner, beer then rum and coke, every day Merc, and still turned up for work every day.
Then the NT, wow, laying and building tank floors and pipework in full long gear, including leather welding jacket.
Carton of VB stubby every night, and the first 6 pack in 15mins, just to get some liquid in us, another 6 before dry mess shut, then party central at my donga, FIFO, 6 months on 2 weeks of your annual holidays off, but it was thirsty work Merc, to me normal, but it was tolerated because I was just a happy person, sober, working or legless and drunk!
Back in Sydney 1981, slowed down a bit but it was nothing for 4 of us to sit and play chess from Friday night until Sunday arvo, 1 carton of Johnny Walker black label, plus 4 cartons VB stubbs, it was like a lifestyle, all my friends were drinkers, I found teetotaller types boring, they thought I was a joke a minute, and I was, but I was welcome anywhere because I was/still am a happy person, I laugh about my cancer, it does not faze me one bit, to me it's a natural progression of the demise of the body/entity known as Billy, or Mr B, or King Billy.
My mother was cremated on 6th October 2016, I lived way out of Perth and dident have enough money for fuel, my brother made the funeral arrangements on the day before my disability pension day, I had $15 bucks, needed $30 bucks, so I bought a 10 pack of cider, sat at home and drunk them!
That was the day I stopped drinking!
Every photo of me and Mum I have either a beer or Bundy in my hand, every photo of us together, but imwas always accepted due to my happiness, I was not a bad drunk, I was funny and happy and still am!
I have had 5 drink drives, 3 in 3 weeks in 3 States and Territories, in one year I had 32 speeding fines and 32 defects on my 62 Holden EK Panel Van, all off one copper from Liverpool Command, it had a 138 grey motor and 1 of the 250 FC Holden crossflow heads, mild cam, ported and polished by me, twin 1 3/4" twin exhaust made by my mate, Jock McCloud, he owned a drag car a early silver Cortina called Mayhem, he made my van sound like a worked 302ci motor, but I loved a drink, that's it, I was a very thirsty person who thought he would end up in " the hospital for thirsty people".lol...
Take it easy brother, and you can do it, stop that is, and you will mate!
Cheers Billy
PS:- in 1986 aged 33, I spent 4 weeks in Liverpool Hospital, it was liver failure, my dad had cancer, he was in Perth, multiple myeloma, back then a shocking way to die, I overdid the sorrowful me bit, and nearly died from the booze, but I had shattered my knee in a bike accident and the meds mixed with the beer nearly destroyed me and my liver, the first day out I went to the Stardust Hotel in Cabramatta!....crazy eh...but you can stop Merc, its hard as you can see from my little effort, but you can and will do it mate!